{"id":5916,"date":"2015-02-28T14:08:04","date_gmt":"2015-02-28T14:08:04","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2018-09-14T17:30:23","modified_gmt":"2018-09-14T14:30:23","slug":"senin-gecmisin-benim-gelecegim","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/2015\/02\/28\/senin-gecmisin-benim-gelecegim\/","title":{"rendered":"“Senin ge\u00e7mi\u015fin, benim gelece\u011fim…”"},"content":{"rendered":"

Ba\u015fl\u0131\u011f\u0131 bir s\u00fcredir -\u00e7ok da bay\u0131lmayarak- okumakta oldu\u011fum Dan Simmons’\u0131n “Hyperion<\/a>” roman\u0131ndan ald\u0131m. Bu bir tek c\u00fcmle, bir hikaye i\u00e7eriyor. Tasla\u011f\u0131 yazay\u0131m, san\u0131r\u0131m ba\u015fka da bir \u015fey yazmayaca\u011f\u0131m bu konuda ileride, taslak olarak kalacak (\u00e7\u00fcnk\u00fc \u00e7ok bariz asl\u0131nda).<\/p>\n

Hikayenin kahraman\u0131 adam\u0131m\u0131z gizemli bir kad\u0131n taraf\u0131ndan birka\u00e7 defa mutlak \u00f6l\u00fcmden (araba \u00e7arpmas\u0131, bir yerden d\u00fc\u015fme, u\u00e7a\u011fa binme, vs..), son dakikada kurtar\u0131l\u0131yor. K\u0131z pek kal\u0131p sohbet etme canl\u0131s\u0131 de\u011fil (gizemli bir \u015fekilde adam bir anl\u0131k arkas\u0131n\u0131 d\u00f6nd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcnde vs.. ortadan kayboluyor), ama i\u015fte adama bak\u0131\u015f\u0131nda, “elini yana\u011f\u0131nda, sa\u00e7lar\u0131nda dola\u015ft\u0131r\u0131\u015f\u0131nda” diyelim, \u00e7ok bariz bir bi\u00e7imde belli ki adam\u0131n hi\u00e7 tan\u0131mad\u0131\u011f\u0131 bu kad\u0131n, adama \u00e7ok yo\u011fun bir bi\u00e7imde a\u015f\u0131k (ama adam merak ediyor, \u015f\u00fcpheye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcyor: “madem ki bu kadar a\u015f\u0131k, niye iki dakika i\u00e7inde kayboluveriyor, ka\u00e7\u0131yor?”. Bu hayat kurtarmalar\u0131n d\u0131\u015f\u0131nda adam g\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcn ucuyla filan ara ara k\u0131z\u0131m\u0131z\u0131, kendisini uzaktan ka\u00e7ak izler durumda yakal\u0131yor ama k\u0131z yine hemen kayboluveriyor. Y\u0131llar ge\u00e7iyor, hikaye kahraman\u0131 adam\u0131m\u0131z k\u0131z\u0131n b\u00f6ylesi yaban\u0131l varl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 yava\u015f yava\u015f \u00f6z\u00fcms\u00fcyor, yava\u015f yava\u015f da a\u015f\u0131k oluyor, sonra art\u0131k dayanam\u0131yor, k\u0131za ula\u015fmaya u\u011fra\u015f\u0131yor, aralarda yine -hep k\u0131z insiyatifli olarak- temaslar, yak\u0131nla\u015fmalar, ziyaretler olmuyor de\u011fil, ama k\u0131z ne konu\u015fuyor, ne de “bu gece de burada kalay\u0131m, sabah kahvalt\u0131y\u0131 birlikte yapar\u0131z” diyor. Sonra bir g\u00fcn ortadan tamam\u0131yla yok oluyor.<\/p>\n

Adam\u0131m\u0131z (esas o\u011flan) akl\u0131n\u0131 ka\u00e7\u0131racak gibi oluyor, her yerde, her anda k\u0131z\u0131 bulmak i\u00e7in delicesine dola\u015f\u0131yor, ar\u0131yor, soruyor… Bir g\u00fcn \u00e7ok s\u0131cak bir havada, \u00e7ok \u0131ss\u0131z bir yerde dola\u015f\u0131rken, \u00e7ok susuyor, bir ev g\u00f6r\u00fcyor, bir bardak su rica etmek i\u00e7in oraya gidiyor, kap\u0131y\u0131 \u00e7al\u0131yor, kap\u0131y\u0131 a\u00e7an b\u00fct\u00fcn hayat\u0131n\u0131 alt \u00fcst eden k\u0131z\u0131n ta kendisi de\u011fil mi! \u015eoka giriyor, k\u0131z onu tan\u0131m\u0131yor (tan\u0131mazl\u0131ktan gelmiyor, hakikaten de tan\u0131m\u0131yor), adam k\u0131z\u0131n, onu tan\u0131d\u0131\u011f\u0131 halinden epey daha gen\u00e7 g\u00f6r\u00fcnd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc fark ediyor (belki k\u0131z\u0131, belki karde\u015fi?…). Kendisini toparl\u0131yor, “ben sizi tan\u0131yorum…” filan diyor, “i\u015fte \u015furan\u0131zda \u015f\u00f6yle bir beniniz var, falan filan…” k\u0131z biraz bir \u015feyler anl\u0131yor gibi oluyor, “benimle gelin l\u00fctfen..” diyor, adam\u0131 i\u00e7eri buyur ediyor, \u00fcst katta i\u00e7inde garip aletlerin oldu\u011fu bir odaya \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131yor, “bu,” diyor, “\u00fczerinde \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131m zaman makinesi… ama hen\u00fcz \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131rmay\u0131 ba\u015faramad\u0131m.”<\/p>\n

Hikaye bir yana, beni iki ekstrem u\u00e7taki durum \u00e7ok etkiledi: ilk durumda k\u0131z\u0131n adam\u0131 \u00e7ok iyi tan\u0131y\u0131p, ona s\u0131r\u0131ls\u0131klam a\u015f\u0131k olup da, adam\u0131n k\u0131z\u0131 tan\u0131mad\u0131\u011f\u0131 durum ile; sondaki adam\u0131n k\u0131za a\u015f\u0131k oldu\u011fu fakat k\u0131z\u0131n adam\u0131 tan\u0131mad\u0131\u011f\u0131 durum. Kli\u015fe paradoks ama ho\u015fuma gitti, sonu\u00e7ta bu ikisi hi\u00e7bir zaman do\u011fal \u015fekilde tan\u0131\u015f\u0131p “kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131kl\u0131, e\u015f zamanl\u0131” a\u015fka d\u00fc\u015femeyecekler, hep bir taraf di\u011ferine 1-0 a\u015f\u0131k olarak ba\u015flayacak. Beynimin arkalar\u0131ndan bir yerden Feynman’\u0131n “Coupled mode approach<\/a>” metodu gelir gibi oluyor ama bir c\u00fcmle \u00fczerinden bu kadar geyik yeter.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Ba\u015fl\u0131\u011f\u0131 bir s\u00fcredir -\u00e7ok da bay\u0131lmayarak- okumakta oldu\u011fum Dan Simmons’\u0131n “Hyperion” roman\u0131ndan ald\u0131m. Bu bir tek c\u00fcmle, bir hikaye i\u00e7eriyor. Tasla\u011f\u0131 yazay\u0131m, san\u0131r\u0131m ba\u015fka da bir \u015fey yazmayaca\u011f\u0131m bu konuda ileride, taslak olarak kalacak (\u00e7\u00fcnk\u00fc \u00e7ok bariz asl\u0131nda). Hikayenin kahraman\u0131 adam\u0131m\u0131z gizemli bir kad\u0131n taraf\u0131ndan birka\u00e7 defa mutlak \u00f6l\u00fcmden (araba \u00e7arpmas\u0131, bir yerden d\u00fc\u015fme, u\u00e7a\u011fa … Okumaya devam et ““Senin ge\u00e7mi\u015fin, benim gelece\u011fim…””<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[9],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5916"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5916"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5916\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6682,"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5916\/revisions\/6682"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5916"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5916"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5916"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}