{"id":6812,"date":"2019-06-26T04:02:40","date_gmt":"2019-06-26T01:02:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/?p=6812"},"modified":"2019-10-30T17:42:03","modified_gmt":"2019-10-30T14:42:03","slug":"bir-hobbitin-guncesi-oradaydim-hala-buradayim","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/2019\/06\/26\/bir-hobbitin-guncesi-oradaydim-hala-buradayim\/","title":{"rendered":"Bir Hobbit’in G\u00fcncesi: Oradayd\u0131m… Hala buraday\u0131m."},"content":{"rendered":"

\u0130nsan -niyeyse- 40 ya\u015fa \u00f6nem veriyor. Bu sat\u0131rlar\u0131n yazar\u0131 yours truly bile bir g\u00fczelleme\/de\u011ferlendirme\/ahkam yaz\u0131s\u0131 \u00e7ekmi\u015fti vaktiyle<\/a>\u00a0(orada G\u00fcrer’e kapak olsun mahiyetinde att\u0131\u011f\u0131m yorum DEVO’nun – Whip It’i \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131 bu arada, iyi mi! Hayat\u0131m\u0131z self referans, self reverans, reviendra<\/a>…)<\/em>. Halbuki 40 ge\u00e7ip gitmi\u015fti pek \u00f6yle dramaya yer vermeden. 42 farkl\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131. Bunda tabii ki so\u011fuk, kay\u0131pla ge\u00e7en bahar\u0131n (bahar demeye dil varmaz) etkisi var. 40 ya\u015f\u0131mda yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 sand\u0131\u011f\u0131m muhasebeyi 42 ya\u015f\u0131m\u0131n ertesinde yapar buldum kendimi.<\/p>\n

The Babylon Project was our last, best hope for peace.<\/p>\n

It failed.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

(ya da:\u00a0vah\u015fi, siyah atlard\u0131k; y\u0131lk\u0131ya b\u0131rak\u0131ld\u0131k (…)\u00a0\u00e7arp\u0131p geri d\u00f6nen d\u00fc\u015flerimizin \u00fcst\u00fcnde \/\u00a0\u00e7\u00fcr\u00fcm\u00fc\u015f cesetleri y\u00fcz\u00fcyor \u015fimdi vah\u015fi siyah atlar\u0131n)<\/p>\n

(ilki Babylon 5<\/em>‘in a\u00e7\u0131l\u0131\u015f\u0131ndan, ikincisi M. Mungan’\u0131n\u00a0Avara<\/em>‘s\u0131ndan detay.)<\/p>\n

Ailemizdeki ilk kay\u0131p ben \u00e7ok k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fckken \u00e7\u0131kageldi, ilkokul 2’deydim san\u0131r\u0131m (1984). Ders aras\u0131 m\u0131yd\u0131, ders miydi, gelip beni \u00e7a\u011f\u0131rd\u0131lar; a\u011fabeyimi de \u00e7a\u011f\u0131rm\u0131\u015flar. Babam gelmi\u015fti, “Allah sevdiklerini yan\u0131na erken al\u0131r” dedi\u011fini hat\u0131rl\u0131yorum babam\u0131n, G\u00fcven Day\u0131m’\u0131 kaybetti\u011fimizi s\u00f6yledi, bize sar\u0131ld\u0131. Babam o g\u00fcn 34 ya\u015f\u0131ndayd\u0131. G\u00fcven Day\u0131m aile b\u00fcy\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm\u00fczd\u00fc, muhte\u015fem bir insand\u0131, 42 ya\u015f\u0131nda bir trafik kazas\u0131nda ya\u015fam\u0131n\u0131 kaybetti. Babam her \u015feyini kaybedip ya\u015fama s\u0131f\u0131rdan ba\u015flad\u0131\u011f\u0131nda 37 ya\u015f\u0131ndayd\u0131. Kazasker hi\u00e7 bilmedi\u011fimiz “kar\u015f\u0131 tarafta”, tarlalarla dolu bir yerdi o zamanlar. Babam hayat\u0131n\u0131 tekrardan ray\u0131na oturttu\u011funda 41 ya\u015f\u0131ndayd\u0131. G\u00fcven Day\u0131m’dan sonra -annemin day\u0131s\u0131- Murat Day\u0131m’\u0131 kaybettik; o da \u00e7ok iyi bir insand\u0131. San\u0131r\u0131m orta 3’e gidiyordum. H\u00fcsniya (anneannem) biz \u0130spanya’dayken vefat etti, sonra babaannem, ard\u0131ndan Mehmet Amcam. \u00dc\u00e7 sene \u00f6nce Murat Day\u0131m’\u0131n e\u015fi Hanife Yengem’i de topra\u011fa verdik. Annem beni s\u0131rt\u0131nda hastaneye ta\u015f\u0131d\u0131\u011f\u0131nda 36 ya\u015f\u0131ndayd\u0131 – b\u00f6yle \u015feyler, baz\u0131 \u015feyler hi\u00e7 unutulmuyor, nas\u0131l unutulur! (“Nahit Han\u0131m s\u00f6yledi yine \/\u00a0Neden babama yazm\u0131\u015f\u0131m<\/a> da anama \u015fiir d\u00f6kt\u00fcrmemi\u015fim \/\u00a0Ka\u00e7 kere yazd\u0131m cebimden u\u00e7up gittiler \/\u00a0Ben on yedi ya\u015f\u0131nda beni y\u0131kayan \/\u00a0Anneme \u015fiir yazacak kadar \u015fair de\u011filim — Can Y\u00fccel). Tiria, Madrid’deki protestocular\u0131<\/a> anlat\u0131rken “ya\u015fl\u0131 insanlar da vard\u0131 aralar\u0131nda, rahat 40 ya\u015f\u0131nda vard\u0131lar” dedi\u011finde biz 35 ya\u015f\u0131ndayd\u0131k. Ben Ankara’ya yerle\u015fti\u011fimde bizimkiler 50 ya\u015f\u0131ndayd\u0131lar. Beng\u00fc ile tan\u0131\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131mda 18, evlendi\u011fimizde 25, Ece do\u011fdu\u011funda 29 ya\u015f\u0131mdayd\u0131m. Babam annemle evlendi\u011finde 24, ben do\u011fdu\u011fumda 27 ya\u015f\u0131ndayd\u0131. Annem \u015fimdi G\u00fcven Day\u0131m’dan onlarca ya\u015f daha b\u00fcy\u00fck (Allah uzun \u00f6m\u00fcr versin). 3-4 sene evvel akl\u0131ma esip de s\u00fcnnet d\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fcn kay\u0131tlar\u0131n\u0131 izledi\u011fimde fark etmi\u015ftim gidenlerin kalanlardan kat be kat daha fazla oldu\u011funu, \u015fimdi ay\u0131rd\u0131na daha bir var\u0131yorum.<\/p>\n

D\u00fcn Ece dedi ki “\u00e7ok h\u0131zl\u0131 b\u00fcy\u00fcyorsunuz, y\u0131llar \u00e7ok \u00e7abuk ge\u00e7iyor” (varolu\u015f\u00e7u kriz demek ki genetik). Hayat\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n g\u00fczel ge\u00e7ti\u011fi i\u00e7in h\u0131zl\u0131 ge\u00e7iyor gibi geldi\u011fini s\u00f6yledik, tabii \u015fu “\u00e7ok y\u00fcce erdemlerimiz<\/a>” uyar\u0131nca, monoton ve rutin (ama iyi anlamda) olmas\u0131n\u0131n da bu h\u0131zl\u0131 ge\u00e7i\u015fe katk\u0131s\u0131 oldu\u011funu ekledik. Her g\u00fcn \u015f\u00fckrediyorum ama i\u015fte son zamanlarda bir korku peyda oldu, korkuyorum (tabii ki kendi ad\u0131ma de\u011fil bu korku).<\/p>\n

Eray ge\u00e7en g\u00fcn facebook’a bir resmimizi koymu\u015f: benim elimde Amiga 500, mutlu mesut poz vermi\u015fiz, hatta:<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Eray \u015fimdi 31 ya\u015f\u0131nda, \u00e7ak\u0131 gibi bir adam, daha ge\u00e7en ay ayr\u0131 eve \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131 (foto\u011fraf\u0131n\u0131 facebook’tan tamam\u0131yla izinsiz apartt\u0131m, bana ne!)<\/p>\n

Diyece\u011fim odur ki, hayat ge\u00e7iyor. \u0130nsan ya\u015flanmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 san\u0131yor, hele de g\u00fcn\u00fc p\u0131r\u0131l p\u0131r\u0131l, birbirinden g\u00fczel insanlar olan \u00f6\u011frencilerle bir arada ge\u00e7irdik\u00e7e. Ama de\u011fil i\u015fte, pekala ya\u015flan\u0131yoruz. Durup bak\u0131nca, y\u0131llar\u0131 say\u0131nca, gidenleri d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcnce ya\u015fland\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcyor. Bir zamanlar\u0131n koca koca kocam\u0131\u015f, ya\u015fl\u0131 amcalar\u0131n\u0131, teyzelerini ge\u00e7mi\u015fiz ya\u015fta, onu fark ediyoruz, k\u0131yaslama ba\u015fl\u0131yor. B\u00fcy\u00fcklerimiz art\u0131k 70 ya\u015f\u0131ndalar, durunca, bu y\u0131ldan o y\u0131l\u0131 \u00e7\u0131karmaya ba\u015flay\u0131nca, hesaba kitaba dal\u0131nca ortaya \u00e7\u0131k\u0131yor. Gidenlerin ard\u0131ndan bak\u0131nca daha iyi anl\u0131yor insan. Mozart’\u0131n 35, Schubert’in 31 ya\u015f\u0131nda \u00f6lm\u00fc\u015f olduklar\u0131n\u0131 akl\u0131m alm\u0131yor. 27ler kl\u00fcb\u00fc art\u0131k \u00e7ok kli\u015fe, oraya hi\u00e7 girmiyorum.<\/p>\n

Neyse ki arkada\u015flar var. Kara g\u00fcn dostlar\u0131, can dostlar. \u0130nsan\u0131n s\u0131rt\u0131n\u0131 dayayabilece\u011fini bildi\u011fi en de\u011ferli hazinelerden. Onlarla birlikte kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131yoruz bu yeni (eski) ya\u015flar\u0131, birlikte ge\u00e7iyoruz zorlu s\u0131navlardan. Ailelerimiz var, ba\u011flar\u0131m\u0131z.<\/p>\n

[at stati\u011fe, orada kals\u0131n: 25\/26 Haziran 2019 04:02]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u0130nsan -niyeyse- 40 ya\u015fa \u00f6nem veriyor. Bu sat\u0131rlar\u0131n yazar\u0131 yours truly bile bir g\u00fczelleme\/de\u011ferlendirme\/ahkam yaz\u0131s\u0131 \u00e7ekmi\u015fti vaktiyle\u00a0(orada G\u00fcrer’e kapak olsun mahiyetinde att\u0131\u011f\u0131m yorum DEVO’nun – Whip It’i \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131 bu arada, iyi mi! Hayat\u0131m\u0131z self referans, self reverans, reviendra…). Halbuki 40 ge\u00e7ip gitmi\u015fti pek \u00f6yle dramaya yer vermeden. 42 farkl\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131. Bunda tabii ki so\u011fuk, kay\u0131pla … Okumaya devam et “Bir Hobbit’in G\u00fcncesi: Oradayd\u0131m… Hala buraday\u0131m.”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6812"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6812"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6812\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6917,"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6812\/revisions\/6917"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6812"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6812"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emresururi.com\/blogs\/sururi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6812"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}